“Dude, you have
become a playboy now! Arun said, counting my hook up tally.
“I guess you are
right.” I said.
I wasn’t sure how
much truth this line held, but it did get me thinking.
It was in a way
‘cool’, wasn’t it? Finally being one of the noticed people? Someone who could
now boast of senseless hookups! Then why did I still want Lia by my side no
matter if it was a sore back or a heartache? I had now been with two beautiful
girls. Still why did I call her first when I achieved anything worth
mentioning?
Memories that
should have, in all the right senses, left me lustful, rather left me feeling
hollow. Why was that?
The answer was not
in a Rubik’s cube put inside a Chinese puzzle box, but it seemed too soon to
enunciating the reason, or for that matter, enunciate my love that had now
rekindled for Lia, as I did not want to be the bad guy again. Thus, till I was
sure about it myself.
She on the other
hand, had found a new friend in Rohit, whom she met a few days after the last
time we spoke extensively over the phone.
Unable to
calculate and differentiate the right from the wrong, my mind seemed to be sagging deeper
in the complicated pit of thoughts and dilemmas that now appeared clearer to
me, and it seemed a task of utmost difficulty to turn a blind eye to the
situation.
And that is when
it happened. The ‘mistake’ that made it apparent for what needed to be done
now.
Being the guy who
had to commit the mistake, and only then accepting it openly as one, the
mistake had to be equally big.
Left with a
shattered heart, and suffering from injuries to no end, it wasn’t too late
before I gave in to the sociological need to feel wanted and accepted, and the
physical need to feel desired. Soundarya surprisingly still was in awe of me,
with the reason yet being a mystery.
Soon enough a
mutual decision was taken to move this so called casual fling to the next
level.
The day of the
execution of this plan was finally here, and so were we, in a room, with no
sunlight, no street, no car seats interrupting, and most importantly, no fear
of getting caught in action by any of the locals or more so, by the police!
On any other day I
might have given it a long thought but not today. As she locked the door behind
her, like a speeding bullet, she was in my arms. I moved closer and planted a
kiss on her luscious lips, making my hold tighter, as we moved towards the
shabby bed.
It was only a
matter of time as my hands were showing the magic again, maneuvering inside her
top, and in a few seconds, there she lay in front of me, without a cloth,
seeming just as pretty, but yet missing just that ‘chemical x’.
As she moved over
me, my hands started to draw back, and lips became unresponsive to her kisses
now.
Fragments of the
small talks that I shared with Lia were coming back now, making me lose focus
of the task at hand.
“Well, this guy,
Rohit, has an amazing bike! I rode that today for about fifteen minutes and it
was so awesome!” She had told me once.
And I had to
remember it with a girl sitting in my lap?
It was in a jiffy
that I realized whatever that was happening here was wrong on my part to go ahead
with it, and unfair if is indeed done, to Lia and Soundarya.
Soundarya noticed
my expressions changing from wanting more, to being uncomfortable. Knowing
nearly all of my backstory, understanding the reason for discomfort was hardly
a task. Nonetheless, she decided it was only wise to leave now, and I could not
be man enough to look her in the eye!
This was the
second time in my life that I was indeed so sure about what I wanted, with the
first time being when I knew I had fallen in love with Lia.
But was I too
late?
Memories of her
getting bowled over by Rohit were haunting now, and all I could do was to wish
that she forgives me. She had been the only one who could make or wreck my day.
So much for affecting my life!
